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Calling All History Buffs (1994)

Calling All History Buffs

Here are a few things I bet you didn’t know about Guadalajara. (Having read a full 1 and half pages in my AAA Tour Guide Book on the subject I am widely considered the foremost authority on the subject.)

It seems that the early Spanish settlers were, in fact, chased here from Zacatecas by he Indians (who resented the Spaniards because they stole their homelands and kept trying to sell them $400.00 deductible auto insurance.)

Early conflicts went something like this.

Settler: The king off Spain says I won this land now and , by the way, the policy does not cover glass breakage.

Indian: (Throws rock)

Settler: Ow! Stop that.

Indian: (Hits the settler with blunt object)

Settler: Ow!

Indian: Hee hee hee

So the settlers finally left there and arrived here in 1542.

Nothing happened or the next 278 years (Although some of the original settlers died.)

In 1810 Father Hidalgo came to town and did two things; 1) Abolished slavery 2) Passed a by-law which states that all large road signs must give the direction to cities 100’s of miles away and the names of the actual streets be kept a secret by printing them on rusty metal sheets no larger than a postage stamp.

In the early 1860’2 Benito Juarez made the city Mexico’s national capitol. This only lasted a few months, however, because, as we historians like to say, it was a goofy idea.

Early in this century fierce fighting broke out between the forces of Alvaro Obregon and Pancho Villa. (Apparently, some very hurtful things were said and feelings got hurt. Villa apparently received a strongly worded letter from Obregon’s lawyer soon after the incident.)

Modern Guadalajara is noted for two things. The cult of machismo (or super masculinity) developed here and the area is deservedly famous for its flowers. This, of course, explains why, throughout North America, the words Florist and Macho are so closely related.

Two things the area is not noted for are heavy industry or journalistic integrity.

For more information on how the auto insurance industry actually works please contact me

#funny #mexico #Ajijic #comedy #lakechapala

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